Part I -- Father, Good Godzilla

My father was a good man. At least he was to me. Tried to be, for me. Other people loved him too. (In the clip below, he's the one on the red tractor).



It was my mother who didn't always think so. Which was funny, because he was so charismatic when he was "out there". You know, saving the world with his smile. Maybe that's what it was, for my mom. Maybe what it was, for my mom, was that "smile" and everything behind it. It was like she had x-ray glasses, seeing the sockets of lightbulbs, the inner workings of clocks.



After a few years of marriage, a smile can cease to be a smile anymore. It can be-- well, you know, not fake-- not intentionally anyway. One can feel good and have legitimate problems. But I suppose, it can be a facade-- but only if what is beneath it is always left unexamined. Always swept under the rug, as-it-were.

Perhaps that is how it all began for him. My father, I mean. Most people don't examine what's under the rug for examination's sake. They look so that they can remove what is causing the uncomfortable bump in the floor. Right? Right? I think my father could see that my mother oftentimes got rather addicted to looking. Even when nothing was there. That was the rabbit in the hat for them. She became a hook for him to hang his coat on-- the all-encompassing thick, wool, black coat. The one with the hood. It was so easy for him to hang it on her. You see, he could sense in her this compulsive detective work. I think she seriously resented being his coat rack. But it was so easy for her to stand there, holding his coat for him. Her muffled protests coming up between the seams.

Part II-- Father, Good Godzilla

There were pictures of them falling in love from the beginning. She often confessed that she felt akin to those eyes of his, all-a-twinkle, right from the start. Now that I'm an adult, I can speculate that for many couples it begins thataway. That "driveless drive", that ambiguity of quote, unquote love. After a month, two, three, whatever it takes-- the masks come off and the projections begin to circulate like so much bad breath around the room.



My father was a good man. At least he was, to me. But there it was, this small thing-- he'd forget to put a cork in his alembic and there were many times what was brewing inside of him would simply spill out all over us. He couldn't seem to be able to distinguish what was himself, and what was my mother. It was as though all boundary lines had ceased to exist, and his own interstellar wars from within became major battles within our kitchen, living room, car-- on our outings and on the phone; no place was safe.

The beast came out unexpectedly, and when he did why, he'd smash up everything in site. Even the hearts belonging to the people he thought he loved. As I got older, I began to suspect that my mother would actually go crazy, with this false picture of reality always presented to her as a mirror. Either that or die of a heart attack. But she didn't. She got angry. She became an all-consuming tornado tearing it up on every divorce blog she could find. Self-defeating behavior, finally acquiescing to the images Godzilla threw at her face.

It didn't take Mom long to figure out she didn't like being the bride of Frankenstein. She didn’t threaten to leave. She sadly acknowledged that she would.




(Or, if you prefer Xena)

Part IIl-- Father, Good Godzilla

As strong as my mother tried to be for herself, in the end, she didn't have to leave. It's simplistic to say that Dad simply learned how to tame his anima, but indeed that is what happened. Like spontaneous combustion. That hag within him, his all-consuming Hydra, learned how to speak. English, too. And that's when everything around us started to change. The world suddenly seemed lighter, the air easier-- everything took on a sort of roundness to it. It became, enjoyable. For all of us. All the time.



I asked my mother several times, "what happened?" How did it work, exactly? I wanted the tips for any marital catastrophes looming in my own future. She didn't know. She said something like I could take care of myself, figure out reality from where I stood. In the end, it was all about that. When I approached my dad a month before he passed, he listened in silence, hearing what Mom had told me years earlier before old age had finished its last pages upon their faces. Was it the mirror, Dad? Did you finally take a good look in the mirror? Was it Mom? When she said she was going to leave if you didn't give your monsters a name and a place, was it that? Dad?

Silence.

"The monsters are still there. Always will be," he said. "But that's not really why she wanted to leave." He paused. "Yes. Giving them a name, and a place-- it encouraged me to see them-- help them. But what it really was, is that they helped me. Yes . . . yes, they helped me in point-of-fact, to see her. Your mother. My wife."

Online Fiction

I haven't posted because I haven't even begun to come up with a coherent plan. I had wanted to make a home for Luna's Desert, but I don't know if this will qualify as online fiction, first of all-- and I don't know that I have the time or expertise to even do this. Basically, it would be Luna's apartment and links to shots of the city in Australia where she lives. There would be her bedroom and links to the characters in the story. There would also be bits and pieces of the story through linking to this and that-- like an easy maze-- just link to this and link to that.

The other idea I had was to find already existing video clips and photos from free photo stock sites and link them in a sort of manner which would connect them to a background story of my choosing. This idea is probably easier to do-- it is online fiction-- don't know about copyright issues so much. And there you have it.

Sympathy for Lady Vengeance

Sympathy for Lady Vengeance (2006) is a Korean film with beautiful cinematography, stark colors and contrasts, and a solid narrative which is told via great dialogue and superb editing. "Be white, like this"-- a great finish to a story of justice and atonement. As soon as the intro-credits roll with the swirling and indents of finger pads, red liquid akin to red blood rolling down, you're hooked-- and it's not corny or cliche' at all. The unique dark humor reflected in the drama surrounding a prison inmate nicknamed "The Witch" as she throws her weight around, and the revenge enacted on her by her roomies is a great backdrop for the real conundrum ahead: Do you leave scum-sucking dirt bags to the state? Do you pronounce and enforce sentence yourself? "Big sins, big atonement. Small sins, small atonement." It can be gruesomely painful to watch at times, but on the whole, you appreciate the sensual ride and the conclusions our heroine comes to make in the end. As part of a revenge trilogy by Park Chan-wook, I look forward to the other two: Sympathy for Mr. Vengeance and Oldboy.

Snowflake Smashing

She's blonde, she's five, and she's trapped in The Desert.

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Luna's relationship with her parents leaves much to be desired. They love her, but they're too busy to help her make sense of her expanding world. When a brass key to their business is lost, Luna must enter The Desert to try to find it and restore balance to not only their world, but hers as well.

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more to follow to finish up the "snowflake process"

I make up stories quite a bit. I especially do so for my daughter, Gretel petal. What would be a lot of fun is compiling them together into a site with photographs of enacted scenes, music, etc.

It'd also be a lot of fun to make an interactive site for my screenplay "Luna's Desert". You could visit Luna's room, visit the Desert, meet creatures there, see Luna's parents-- their places of work, etc.

Another interest I have would be to create a nonpolitical political site. Something like: Obama, Clinton, and McCain have all been shot by a team of unknown sniper ninjas. Oh wait-- perhaps that wouldn't be so nonpolitically political. "All Presidential Ass Candidates Shot" sure does have a nice ring to it though.

Online fiction is awesome- as long as you're sitting at the computer, you might as well jump into a fictional story or enjoy the interaction between real-life computer nerds who are role playing as themselves in fictional circumstances.

There are some fantastic narratives being created as I type. What I find so interesting are the spin-offs of fiction and the different ways to relate and connect with others through fiction. For example, an amazing first-of-its-kind hypertext book "Patchwork Girl".
Now, this book isn't available online, and I don't think you can even download it. So I don't know that you would classify it as online fiction. However, I did find this great review of the book in which the reviewer professes to be the girl in patchwork girl. What's so interesting about this, is that a real review of a real work of fiction is written under the auspices of a fictional character who creates a new fictional reality.

This next reference is a bit tricky. There's a blog spot called "Our Souls Journey" which seems to be maintained and subscribed to by every hippie burnout who's obtained "enlightenment" on the planet. However, the key is that however mystically esoteric much of the drivel may be, the blog seems to operate from a place of nonfiction intent. That being said, I did find a bit of obvious fiction on the site, just scroll down until you read:

'On the very
inner fringes of
primordial creation there was born a constellation of
Seven Stars. As
time passed each was ruled by a Prince and a King
bound them all. They
evolved from the material to the spiritual. In the
spiritual they sought out all creation, seeking to
harmonize, to learn,
to grow and to acquire understanding. Their threads of
consciousness
spread over the Universe as a closely woven yarn,
making the vastness . . .'

You get the point. What is interesting about this particular fiction is that the bloggers generally utilize fiction to emphasize nonfictional beliefs and lifestyles.

How is Liberty Best Preserved in the Desert?

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Economic_encroachment

It's an extensive topic and I'm movin' as fast as I can. The research is fun, but editing in Wiki is not. Please let me know what sounds like gibberish, what sounds like opinionated rhetoric, and what you like too-- that last bit is what keeps me motivated.

Wikipedia post isn't due in my class until Wed. and I don't know how I got that wrong, but it will be posted by then. It's proving very interesting to research--

Wiki in dire need of article re: Encroachment

I'm going to write a bit about economic encroachment. A brief history of economic encroachment will be the most pertinent aspect of my article to come to a better understanding of its place in our world. As far as Wiki commandments are concerned, I think that fact is obviously most important, and I'll try to make it as cut-and-dry as possible. Up by Sunday.

(Thanks for your comments-- overly ambitious endeavor has been updated)